You’re here! You’re reading this article because you’re interested in becoming a starter and that is absolutely the first step in reaching your goals. When it comes to steps, we often hear the adage, “one step at a time,” but I actually prefer “one bite at a time.” I believe that reaching goals and living your best life includes making a decision to move forward, then taking a bite of it—a little chunk at a time.
For example, imagine sitting at home and thinking about going out to dinner with friends. It’s been a while and your refrigerator is full, but you’re feeling a little down, you’ve put on a few pounds (hello, COVID!) and are feeling a bit anxious about getting back out there, even though you know that a little socializing would probably do you a world of good. What do you do, and where do you start?
One of the easiest ways to conquer fears or hesitations about doing something you KNOW would be good for you is to think of it in terms of short-term goals. Long terms goals are important, yes, but they can sometimes be overwhelming. If you focus instead on a short-term goal (For example, getting out of the house and not feeling so down), then you can easily take a baby bite toward that goal. Maybe you’re not ready for a big party where your ex-boyfriend will likely show up, but a small dinner with two friends could be just the ticket to improving your current mood. Ask yourself, what can I do right now that would be an improvement over what I have been doing? Then, do that thing!
What’s Really Holding You Back?
You might not think your long-term goals are that scary. I mean, what’s frightening about wanting to make more money? Or having more friends? Those are good things, right? But if you aren’t taking steps toward meeting those goals, there’s probably something in your subconscious that’s holding you back. Back to the baby bites. Everything you want in tiny, manageable chunks. Consistency and effort will get you results, eventually, and even if you don’t think you’re moving fast enough—remember, you are making progress.
Sharing Your Goals
Experts say that telling friends and family about your goals creates a premature sense of completeness; in other words, you can visualize reaching your goals because you’ve made yourself accountable to others. Also, you can get valuable feedback. If, for example, your goal is weight loss and you tell your accountability friends you’d like to go out for pizza and nachos, they’re probably going to tell you, um, no, that won’t work. Sometimes we put on our blinders and people who love us will (sometimes gently, sometimes not) slap us in the face to keep us on track.
Go With Your Gut
Each of us has an innate sense of what is truly good for us, and what isn’t. While feedback from loved ones can be very helpful, ultimately, we need to be able to rely on ourselves to fuel our goals. And we can, without a doubt. When you regularly check in with yourself, asking … is the decision I’m about to make moving me toward my goal or away from it, then you’ll immediately know the next best step. The answer to the question, is xyz making a positive shift in my life should always be YES.
What (or Who) Needs to Change?
While it is important to show gratitude toward the people who want to help you, it might also be time to ask, what needs to change? Are the people whose advice you solicit truly helpful, or simply experts at negativity? Are their own fears and limitations rubbing off on you? If you’re trying to lose weight, are the foods you’re eating promoting weight loss, or weight gain? Do the restaurants you frequent even offer foods that will help you reach your goals? In business, are the clients you’re soliciting helping you grow your business, or have you reached a level where you’re no longer increasing revenue? The point is, you might need to change what you’ve “always done” to get where you want to be.
Getting real about making changes doesn’t have to be all or nothing, or everything at once. Like so many other things in life, baby bites are what will get you there. A little bite here, a little bite there—and consistency, every bite of the way.
Louis “The Laser Guy’s” Three Additional Tips to Become a Starter:
- Don’t be afraid to make mistakes! Mistakes are what teach us to do better. Just don’t hang onto them, ruminating over what you “should” have done. It has been said that a repeated mistake is a decision, so move on quickly.
- Remind yourself on a regular basis WHAT your goal is and take a baby bite daily to get you there. If you need visual reminders, use post-it notes on your mirror, computer, etc.
- Celebrate every accomplishment, no matter how small, along the way. Don’t wait until you’ve met your long-term goal; baby bites should be rewarded with regular baby rewards!
Louis “The Laser Guy” Silberman is CEO/Founder of National Laser Institute, a cosmetic laser and medical esthetic training institute. He is the owner of medical spas in Scottsdale, Arizona, and Dallas, Texas, and a nationally recognized author and motivational marketing speaker. Silberman created the 6th most visited online health site and was a semi-finalist for the Ernst and Young Entrepreneur of the Year Award 2014. He can be contacted at email@example.com and follow him on Instagram @ louisthelaserguy.